Posts Tagged ‘cars’

Gonk’s running better than ever.

I have a 1999 Golf (nicknamed “Gonk”) that I picked up from a used car lot a few years ago. Ever since I got it, it’s had this hesitation after it warms up. I finally fixed it tonight!

Turns out it was the crankcase ventilation hose. The thing was cracked right where it hooks into the block. The entire hose was brittle, and grimy as hell. I popped over to the local generic parts shop and they didn’t have a replacement. But they did have some heater hose that fit the bill.

I had to trim away a bit of the inner diameter from the end of the hose in order to fit the little metal pipe into it (and do a lot of pushing and cursing), but it seems to be doing its job just fine.

Gonk is running better than I’ve ever seen. I no longer have to put my foot in it to get it to move. It’s very smooth.

The thing that irritated me most about the problem was how inconsistent it was. As a programmer, I can’t stand intermittent bugs. Sometimes the thing would run like it was on rails, other times it would sputter and barely be able to move from a dead stop. It would take forever to get up to speed. I’m pretty sure the hose was fluctuating between being sealed and unsealed, which cause the ECU (Engine Control Unit) to get bad data and freak out.

Now I just need to get a new clutch and buy some shocks/struts to replace the worn-out sponges that are impersonating a suspension. After that, I’m probably going to drop a mild cam/chip combo in it.

(Some info for fellow veedubbers out there: i have the 2.0 8 valve ABA engine, OBDII. Gonk is a silver mkIII wolfsburg edition. I hope to change the 2-point-slow into a 2-point-go over the course of the next year or so)


Everybody Gets a Corvette: My Recession Solution

To help out the American car manufacturers, who are apparently too huge to let fail, and to help out all the actual, real physical people who are living through this recession, I propose that the US government purchase a Chevrolet Corvette for every citizen in the country.

We could establish a Department of Vette Affairs to handle the distribution of the vehicles, and handle any substitutions that citizens may want. Instead of a Corvette, taxpayers should be able to choose any domestically-built vehicle from any of the Big 3 automakers. For instance, if you’re an idiot you could pick a Chrysler Sebring.

The money’s going to the automakers anyway, with no apparent benefit to taxpayers. With my Everybody Gets a Corvette plan, we ensure that the money is actually being spent throughout the supply chain the way it’s supposed to be. AND the American taxpayer gets a direct, tangible benefit!

Write to your congressperson. Better yet, buy yourself a senate seat and propose/support this legislation.